The Good News Bible says ¹⁴ You don't even know what your life tomorrow will be! You are like a puff of smoke, which appears for a moment and then disappears. Our neighbours had a barbecue on Monday. We saw the smoke. The cooking smelt delicious. We were going to eat bread and cheese at the time though that is not a problem in this country where there is a great choice of breads and cheeses. In fact too much of a choice. However whilst the barbecue was looking our washing was drying, outside, on the line in the sun- and the smoke.

Now even a few days later we have an olfactory reminder of the neighbour's lunch. Maybe a puff of smoke quickly vanishes but it's effects can linger. Often I mention the people who have effected me and my growth but I think here, (this passage) it is more important to consider the effect that we have on those around us.

Happy New Year

Lent is a time when we make resolutions, such as drink less coffee or less wine, eat no chocolate or desserts, or even take up something spiritual such as reading a daily meditation. Lent lasts fro 46 days - including the Sundays. It is proven that it only takes 21 days to make a habit therefore we should all now be happy with following healthy habits for body and spirit.

Easter celebrates the after death life of Christ. new life, new year. Shall I keep up those resolutions. I will endeavor to do so. One of them was writing each day. Maybe in this space, maybe on paper.

Today there is no Gospel

Today there is no gospel. Jesus is no longer walking with his disciples. he is in the tomb.

Yesterday the Jewish leaders denied the Lord to be their king. The streets were throbbing with anticipated pain, crosses being carried, insults being hurled. Preparations were being made for a Sabbath rest.

The skull shaped hill was covered with blood and gore, home to three deaths. Four Roman soldiers were impressed by one death.

Today is the day of Sabbath rest. Nothing is happening. The streets are empty. The new tomb is full, filled in haste and secrecy the night before this day dawned.

Nothing moves. All are behind doors.

Tomorrow A dawn of glory in a garden of awakening joy.

Genesis 22:1-14

“Watch his eyes for the slightest movement”. (Ward Sister Northampton General Hospital 26 years ago this last Ash Wednesday).

³⁴ Instead, one of the soldiers pierced Jesus’ side with a spear, bringing a sudden flow of blood and water. John 19:34 (New International Version, ©2010)

We stood at the foot of the bed with David Williamson, the curate from our previous parish who had driven many miles over the past few days to be a God-given presence in our waiting. We watched as the tests for death were performed. The only one I remember is ice water injected into the ears. Nothing. After three days of total inactivity whilst on a respirator I am not sure that I really wanted to see any reaction.

One of the things which had kept me believing during those three days had been Abraham and Isaac walking up the hill. Those three days might not have been very strenuous activity but they had been a great effort. One of my spiritual mentors had reminded me of this story when I called to tell her about Matthew’s crib death and subsequent resuscitation. We had walked up the hill and now our son was on the altar, a little lamb would come and Matthew would be given back to us to nurture into adulthood.

No flicker of an eye, no twitch of a toe. Death was decreed on March 9^th 1985. The doctor and nurses thanked David and me for our consideration. Our consideration? I think for decorum in our grief. Our grief was no less because God, physically in the form of David Williamson was with us. We still have ‘a gap’ called Matthew. Every time I read this episode in Genesis I am reminded of those three days- the expectation of the little lamb in the form of a flicker of an eye or the suckle of a nipple. After the gathering of the wood there was no little lamb for us on the mountaintop.

The grief is still with us in spite of the years and children since the days of struggle up the mountain and the test on the summit. But grief with God is not as empty as grief without him. So it is with the cross of Good Friday. It is a day of mourning with God.

Bread

1 Corinthians 10:14-17,11:27-32

I am going to the boulangerie to day to buy bread. There is nothing unusual about that. Today because of this passage it will be a different experience for me. I will not even think about buying some 'pistolets' (bread rolls) I shall go for a loaf of bread, one to share with my family. A loaf that will be cut or torn into portions, we shall discuss how much each of us wants. We shall have to share the bread. We shall each receive exactly the same nutrients.

Even within our family we have our differences. Within our church family there are even more differences. Last week I upset both the other members of our coffee team, one by including her name in an email that I sent and the other by not including her. I feel bad about it. I hope they can forgive me and understand that we are all part of the same church family. I will learn not to take people for granted. I would not want to injure another part of my own body. But when I did break my elbow I had to live with it, it was still part of my body with its plaster and pain.

One bread, one body, one family, one church family one worldwide family united in Christ.

Rejoice always.

Philippians 4:1-13

" ⁹ Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you."

Maybe " ⁹ Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me". The seen bit I am not so sure about. It is much easier to lecture about than to practice rejoicing in all circumstances and thinking noble and pure thoughts.

Take driving for instance. When I light changes to red just in front of me do I thank God for the mini rest He is giving me or grouch that I am not completing my agenda as fast as I would like?

My current anxiety is that I bought some, by my standards, expensive curtain material and forgot to take matching the pattern into account. Also the curtain lining was not the same width as the previous lot which I had bought at the same shop. I have not yet got to the stage of rejoicing over the circumstance. I am in a state of anxiety. Perhaps if I pray God will guide me to a solution. And why did I write "Perhaps..." I should trust.

I will sing -in my head not wanting to inflict my singing on anybody other than God and myself- "I will rejoice in the Lord always and again I say rejoice"

Dandelions

John 12:20-26

We have many dandelions in our garden. Today I must try to pick all the radiant yellow discs otherwise later in the summer our whole garden may be filled with dandelions and leave no space for anything else to grow. We have quite a few flower clocks already. Do you remember blowing the seed heads and counting how many puffs it took to clear the head of seeds- that was the time?

I am doing well with dandelions but how am I at growing Christians, at bringing people to Jesus?